Ready To Shoot Someone

I probably should just delete this entry right now. I'm feeling really frustrated and just generally pissed off today, so while it feels good to get this stuff off my chest, I'm hardly expecting a coherent blog post here. More like an irate rant about stuff that most people (including myself most days) wouldn't be bothered by in the least. *deep breath*

I need to shoot some new content today - photos and videos for this site, plus for my sexy feet site. I'm trying to come up with a plan that includes my ideas and member requests which has me going through outfits and piles of lingerie, matching with shoes and looking around my tiny apartment to figure where I can shoot that I haven't already used a bunch of times before. Then I'll need to do a major clean & try to de-dog everything, move furniture out of the way & set up the lights. Oh, are my batteries charged? For the camera, flash AND the video camera?

Then there's the annoying beauty prep. I'm sure there are some women who like nothing better than to spend the day doing hair treatments, face masks and painting their nails. I am not one of them. I find all of that girly crap tedious and boring. I like the end result, but I loathe the process. If I could afford to go to a salon to have it done for me it would only be slightly less excruciating, assuming I've got a good book to read, because I'd have to make small talk with the trendy hipsters quietly judging me for my lack of tattoos, piercings and ill-fitting clothes.


(An aside: what's the deal with short, squat hipster chicks wearing skinny jeans that sit so low on their hips it looks like they've got a turd in their pants? Right underneath their muffin tops? Most. Unattractive. Look. Evah.)


So what am I going to shoot today? Well I painted my toes a pale yellow last night, so they're looking very spring timey and cute. I haven't been tanning, so my skin is super pale. And I haven't been working out as much as I need to, so that rules out a bunch of shoot ideas I have in my head. I know, I know...I look fine. But for shoots like an oiled up sweaty yoga session wearing a pair of pink leg warmers, I need to look more Flashdance and less belly dance.

I've got an idea for a retro shoot in the kitchen, but I haven't found a suitable apron yet. I've got some gorgeous black stockings that I'd love to do a really elegant shoot with, but I really have nowhere in my house that I would consider "elegant". It's days like this that I really wish I had a big studio and a stylist and a professional photographer who knows my best angles. A personal trainer couldn't hurt either.

At the very least, it would be nice to rent a hotel room for the day so I'd have a new, clean space to work with. Of course, I'd still be complaining about having to dismantle my giant softboxes to drag over to a hotel (and suffer through the looks of the folks in the lobby as I lug such big cases to the elevator).

Now that I've ranted a bit (OK a lot!), I do feel better. My toes? Do look super cute painted this pale yellow. Once I get it all set up, I always enjoy posing, playing and teasing the camera. I guess all this stress is the same thing a woman feels before a big date. Did I shave? Everywhere? Is the house clean? Is my make-up just right? Do I have a run in my stockings?

At least at the end of my big date, I know I'll be satisfied AND I won't have to eat dinner across from someone who chews with his mouth open.